Reminding Readers of Lawyer Joke

"Fish spawn in cement creek" reads today's main headline about Matadero Creek. Adding bottom-feeding heavy metal-eating carp to the story merely raises the disgust factor . The whole thing sounds freakish. (By the way, when does a creek, when turned into a sometime skate park/landing strip, get renamed as a slough, trench or culvert?) Although, I'm aware that carp are common to this country, I did not know that they are non-native--having been introduced by pre-war German spys pretty much to upset future mid-peninsula residents hyper-sensitive about which animals were assigned to live here...effectively settling the evolution argument.

When asked whether the fish could be caught, officials were uncertain. This is a tip-off that they weren't real officials. Officials would always answer--no. This would be followed by appointing a blue ribbon commission to determine what obstacles could be expected upstream from Portola Valley residents. Department of Fish and Game were busy with more pressing business.

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
A: One is a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other is a catfish.